Lies!!! Lies!!! No more lies!!!!
Dusted & Fried--Down Home with 12 piece bucket
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02-02-2006, 01:03 AM
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Senior Member
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Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Thomasville, NC
Posts: 4,380
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Lies!!! Lies!!! No more lies!!!!
Ok boys . . . let's help each other out. If you REALLY want to help your game, this is where we should start.
What is the MOST deceitful dispicable dishonest LIE that you have told your wife/significant other/baby's mama so you could sneak away to the golf course or practice range?
Let's hear how creative you bunch of Koolaid slurpers really are . . .
I ain't talking about the old stand-bys either like . . .
"I had a meeting that ran a bit long sweetheart."
"I was shopping early for our 60th anniversary."
"I decided to take your mother to lunch."
"I went to the Dr. Phil show to get some pointers on improving our relationship and to figure out how to get you to . . . SHUT THE HELL UP!!!"
__________________
Aloha Mr. Hand
Behold my hands; reach hither thy hand
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02-02-2006, 01:25 AM
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Junior Member
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Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Menifee, CA
Posts: 25
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No More Lies
12 Piece
I don't have to lie anymore got rid of her  Just kidding, no more lies for me. I found a solution to my addition with the G.O.L.F. I work by a golf course that is 4 minutes from my work. Lunch time is my favorite part of my day. My lunch is white crack best diet ever; One or two buckets of white crack I am good to go (Tuesday,Wednesday,Thrusday) and Monday night from 7:00PM PST till 10:00PM PST All you can hit white crack till the Lights go out. Friday,Saturday and Sunday Family time. How good does it get.  I try to squeeze in a round or two between wife and kids activities.
Regards
Ball Turf
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02-02-2006, 07:01 AM
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Senior Member
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Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Black Mountain, NC
Posts: 415
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Sex, lies, and no video tapes.
He: Forgive me, darling. I've been having an affair with my secretary. We were at a hotel all afternoon, making love.
She: Don't lie to me you no good b*stard! You've been playing golf, haven't you!
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02-02-2006, 08:12 AM
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Senior Member
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Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Singapore
Posts: 627
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Originally Posted by Ball Turf
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12 Piece
I don't have to lie anymore got rid of her Just kidding, no more lies for me. I found a solution to my addition with the G.O.L.F. I work by a golf course that is 4 minutes from my work. Lunch time is my favorite part of my day. My lunch is white crack best diet ever; One or two buckets of white crack I am good to go (Tuesday,Wednesday,Thrusday) and Monday night from 7:00PM PST till 10:00PM PST All you can hit white crack till the Lights go out. Friday,Saturday and Sunday Family time. How good does it get. I try to squeeze in a round or two between wife and kids activities.
Regards
Ball Turf
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Hey Bud,
I play golf whenever I want...I have no wife to contend with... 
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02-02-2006, 08:56 AM
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Senior Member
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Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Pinehurst, NC
Posts: 158
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My Wife
My wife is a 9 handicap. She complains if I don't play enough.
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A mile from the place that golf calls home
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02-02-2006, 09:11 AM
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Administrator
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Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Austin, Tx
Posts: 846
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Did you here the one about.....?
A man asked his girlfriend to marry him. She said no, and the man lived happily ever after and played golf every day. 
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02-02-2006, 09:13 AM
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Senior Member
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Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Thomasville, NC
Posts: 4,380
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A Keeper!
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Originally Posted by RickPinewild
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My wife is a 9 handicap. She complains if I don't play enough.
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How's her sister look? Does she have all her teeth? If she doesn't have a sister . . . How's her brother look?
__________________
Aloha Mr. Hand
Behold my hands; reach hither thy hand
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02-02-2006, 09:18 AM
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Senior Member
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Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Thomasville, NC
Posts: 4,380
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Crackheads
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Originally Posted by Ball Turf
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12 Piece
I don't have to lie anymore got rid of her Just kidding, no more lies for me. I found a solution to my addition with the G.O.L.F. I work by a golf course that is 4 minutes from my work. Lunch time is my favorite part of my day. My lunch is white crack best diet ever; One or two buckets of white crack I am good to go (Tuesday,Wednesday,Thrusday) and Monday night from 7:00PM PST till 10:00PM PST All you can hit white crack till the Lights go out. Friday,Saturday and Sunday Family time. How good does it get. I try to squeeze in a round or two between wife and kids activities.
Regards
Ball Turf
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You got it made dude! Is the handicap trending down?
Now that you're all hyped up on the crack . . . got get them kiddies hooked on crack too. My oldest is 4. I gave him some crack. He thought it was a sword. Still bruised on my ankles. Some have violent reactions when on crack.
Get them young'uns hooked on crack early.
Crack don't kill . . . crack is good.
__________________
Aloha Mr. Hand
Behold my hands; reach hither thy hand
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02-02-2006, 09:24 AM
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Senior Member
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Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Pinehurst, NC
Posts: 158
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Originally Posted by 12 piece bucket
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How's her sister look? Does she have all her teeth? If she doesn't have a sister . . . How's her brother look?
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No sister, sorry. I'd fix you up with her brother, but he doesn't play. Why don't we play sometime, I'll drive up from Pinehurst and meet you! You can introduce me to REAL BBQ.
__________________
A mile from the place that golf calls home
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02-02-2006, 09:30 AM
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Senior Member
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Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Thomasville, NC
Posts: 4,380
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Originally Posted by RickPinewild
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No sister, sorry. I'd fix you up with her brother, but he doesn't play. Why don't we play sometime, I'll drive up from Pinehurst and meet you! You can introduce me to REAL BBQ.
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Works for me. I could probably be talked into driving down your way. We could recruit Eddie Cox and Annikan Skywalker. You won't learn much from me, but those boys are for real.
__________________
Aloha Mr. Hand
Behold my hands; reach hither thy hand
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