You know you are a machine head when:

[kmmcnabb]

I recognize many but love

You have totally lost the ability to discriminate between people 'listening' and people 'staring'.


I don't give "golf advice" but when pressured, will respond with advice from the "yellow book". I think I can even italizize my voice now.

How about:

-You give all your golfing buddies a copy of TGM for Christmas, no matter how many you have given in past Christmas's. (Really, one friend has 3 copies, all from me on X-mas).....You can't get through to some folks.

[drewitgolf]

You guys are killing me. I can't stop laughing. And I (or a least my wife) thought I was crazy; you guys make me feel normal!

A toast to the rise of "The Machine Heads" .

[Martee]

you have dowel rods in every room of the house, including the bathroom....

[12 piece bucket]

you have dowel rods in every room of the house, including the bathroom....

Hmmm . . . rods bathroom . . . the hell with it. Too easy.

[comdpa]

You think nothing of walking with a bent right wrist all the day long...in fact, try as hard as you might to straighten it, you can't, for it has been frozen bent!

[Bagger Lance]

You steer your car with a flat left/bent right wrist

The Home Depot Manager orders more dowels because the stock is slightly warped

You have a putter, club, and dowels in your office and routinely practice your alignments in the hallway.

The yellow book is laying on top of your Bible on the nightstand.

You stand outside at 1AM in freezing rain testing the latest epiphany learned from the forum.

You trace plane lines on the tiles of the shower.

[rchang72]

Random objects become impact bags.

Hinges are found on your left arm and not the doors.

You spend as much time chipping/pitching on the range as you do on full stroke.

You spend more time practicing with things found in a hardware store than you do with things found in a golf store.

Leadbeater/Flick/Harmon/Haney elicit as much good will as Bin Laden/Hitler/Attila the Hun

Down & out is a good thing

[birdie_man]

You trace plane lines on the tiles of the shower.

Done it! Many times!

Trace a Straight Plane Line with the shampoo bottle....!